Another set of developer / programmer / hacker-related jokes:
A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air.
His girlfriend becomes irritated with the smoke and says, “Can’t you see
the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your
To which the man replies, “I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings; we only worry about errors.”
There are three kinds of lies: Lies, damned lies, and benchmarks.
The computer is mightier than the pen, the sword, and usually, the programmer.
A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls
up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, “Where’d you get
The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, a
beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and
said, ‘You can have anything you want’.”
The first student responds, “Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”