Some old geek jokes

  • There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't
  • I'm not anti-social; I'm just not user friendly
  • I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code
  • Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...
  • The box said 'Requires Windows 8 or better'. So I installed Linux
  • Unix, DOS and Windows...the good, the bad and the ugly
  • The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong
  • C++ is a write-only language. I can write programs in C++, but I can't read any of them
  • How's my programming? Call 1-800-DEV-NULL
  • Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft...and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor
  • UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity
  • You know it's love when you memorize her IP number to skip DNS overhead
  • JUST SHUT UP AND REBOOT!!
  • How do I set a laser printer to stun?
  • There is only one satisfying way to boot a computer
  • It's not bogus, it's an IBM standard
  • Beware of programmers that carry screwdrivers
  • Squash one bug, you'll see ten new bugs popping
  • Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes
  • Does fuzzy logic tickle?
  • The truth is out there...try to google it?
  • Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
  • Press every key to continue
  • Computers can never replace human stupidity
  • Unix is user friendly...its just selective about who its friends are
  • Artificial intelligence usually beats real stupidity
  • Black holes are where God divided by zero
  • Hey! It compiles! Ship it!
  • All computers run at the same speed... with the power off
  • I'm sorry, our software is perfect. The problem must be you
  • What color do you want that database?
  • Programming is like sex; one mistake and you have to support for a lifetime.
  • There are two ways to write error-free programs. Only the third one works.